rise and root



The Flame Haired Solstice Dreamer

Cold winter brings the Everfrost and jewels every tree
In a forest new as birth and old as old can be
A flame~haired dreamer wanders there and shelters from the wind
And spins her dreams around the trees to break the ties that bind
She takes her thread and spins anew and how the Greenwood smiles
As she spins a spell for freedom and for her spirit Wylde

The dreamer finds an ancient oak and shelters in his lee
In a forest new as birth and old as old can be
Tis summer now and birdsong weaves its magick through her spells
And humming bees drum drowsily in the foxglove's bells
The dreamer sits beneath the oak with yarn upon her knee
And spins and knits and weaves her dreams and sets her spirit free

"When birds fall from the sky and the animals are dying, a new tribe of people...shall come unto the earth from many colors, classes, creeds, who by their actions and deeds shall make the earth green again. they will be known as the warriors of the Rainbow"

Hopi Prophecy

~so it begins~

i am now on the gynecological conveyor belt

i managed to bring my hospital appointment with the gynecologist forward by two weeks and so yesterday afternoon saw me waiting...and waiting...at our local hospital.

i finally found out how large my fibroid is, 6 x 7cm so no wonder i have been having so much trouble.

in discussion with the gynecologist it was agreed that because of the size i need to be knocked out and have it investigated by camera to see exactly whats what~whether it is fully in the womb, partly in the wall of the womb, whatever.
he said the option of going in a shaving layers of it away is not an option because of its size and his repeated questioning of whether i wanted children~the answer is no~is maybe directing his plan of my having surgery.

i am now hoping that my conveyor belt will move quickly.i am having so much trouble now~laying to sleep is uncomfortable because i think gravity must be at work and pulling fluffy down, walking is getting uncomfortable because i have this dragging feeling with each step, the dragging back pain is getting more frequent and i now have pain and nausea when i eat and drink and even sitting and the cough i still have is giving me pain.

its also just making me miserable and tearful~i can cope with my m.e and diabetes but this is something altogether different~a constant dragging pain that is taking away my smile and pulling me down with it.


Rose said...

It sounds horrid... I hope the NHS works quickly and efficiently for you and it is all resolved as soon as possible. XXX

dubgirl said...

Sending you good wishes for a quick resolution for fluffy. Hope you are going to feel better soon x

Rowan said...

Poor Laoi! I feel so sorry for you and really hope that you get this seen to very soon. It's good that at least your hospital appointment was brought forward, at least you are in the system now and things are moving. Take care.

Laura said...

i hope that you feel better soon.. i think the not knowing what is wrong is almost as bad as the waiting to get it resolved.

GooseBreeder said...

Oh poor you,sometimes one extra thing just take us over the top of what we can bear.Hope your appointment comes quickly and you have your 'kit bag of tricks' to help you cope in the meantime.If that idea interests you or is helpful email me and I'll send you some ideas.
In sisterhood,good wishes.

Pixiedust said...

Oh Lee that sounds awfull, you poor thing, I'm not surprised your feeling tearfull. I hope they get you in soon and sort it out for you. (((((big hugs)))) Pixie xxxx

Sue Simpson aka - The Purple Pixie said...

You poor thing, I can't imagine how it must feel for you. Sending you warmest fluffy blankets and great big hugs and letting you know you'e in my thoughts.
Brightest blessings,
Sue xxx

Leanne said...

just caught up with this, be gentle on yourself, its ok to feel tearful sometimes. i am glad this is being sorted out for you laoi
Leanne x

All things share the same breath~the beast, the tree, the man, the air shares its spirit with all the life it supports.

Chief Seattle

Johney Gaul~1915

Johney Gaul~1915
1890-17 september 1918~France