~darkness~

the winter solstice is knocking on the door and the darkness here is total.

daylight starts appearing around 7.30am and returns around 4pm~it feels like i should be hibernating, in fact i think i partly am.

i have had little motivation to do anything except read, a little crochet or catch up on my history/archaeology programs and films.

today swampy and i spent a little time de-cluttering~my work room had become a bit of a dumping ground and i had to remedy that thinking that it was the reason for my lack of motivation in my crafting.

it looks a whole lot better and i have taken out a wooden chest that was taking up valuable floor space.

after yule i shall start to get busy with some new ideas for the wylde apothecary

***

this year we will not be attending the private ritual at stonehenge for the solstice~our present health means we cannot stand in a ritual for two hours and so i shall be (if it is not raining) having one of my small rituals in my garden with a small fire and incense.

***

we are also all ready for our family christmas, i have a pile of books to wrap and plans for food~especially a vegan fudge i have seen, i have a jar of spices to make mulled wine and 15 month old sloe gin that needs decanting and sampling.

yule/christmas is quiet here, living in the heart of the forest we are free from the commercialism that is rife this time of the year. on christmas day we all gather at my mums house and on boxing day they they come and spend the day with us. all the other days it is quiet time at home.

~a sofa day~

today is a sofa day

actually i have had a few sofa days this week

i am having a bit of a fibromyalgia flare up as well as a lot of pain from osteoarthritis making typing this very painful~so this could well be a short post but i am determined to start to blog regularly.

the weather here in this ancient forest is a typical dark, stormy winters day. i was in the garden earlier watching as swampy was using foraged birch and hazel sticks to make a makeshift fence. we still have some nasturtium flowering and my pot of canyon sage has many little purple flowers and smells gorgeous when touched~releasing a spicy scent into the air.

our black elder is going a bit wild and swampy took off two long thin branches-these are going to be dried and sanded and will be created into wands to be sold at the wylde apothecary next year. i have also been going through the seasoned branches we have in the shed to find some good pieces for my new inspiration-decorated wooden pendants/amulets/talismans.

i have also had some inspiration on making medieval scrip bags so watch this space...

~heatwave~

this heatwave we are experiencing is really getting the better of me at the moment

the heat seems to be relentless and making even the smallest thing difficult to do~as a result i have not had the urge to even turn on my laptop.

all i have been doing, or so it seems, has been to mop my brow almost continuously and have lots of cold wash downs with a flannel.

its also been making me grumpy and all i have wanted to do has been read in a cool, dark room...although the rooms have not been cool at all!

we did have the most explosive thunderstorm just over a week ago~the kind of storm i have nver witnessed in my whole life. the thunder and lightning was right above the village and there was no gap between any of the thunder or lightning. we just had continual noise and light and finally our power went out until the next morning.

it did not however make things any cooler-it just became hotter...and hotter.

two days ago we had a small, daytime summer storm and today it is cloudy and hot~so we are both hoping for some cooling rain.

***

i have had to start to get organised for the new forest fairy festival which is now only two weeks away~this morning i was packing up some of my hand blended incense and ordering some of the resins i am growing low on.

***

little merlin is now very at home with us and while magpie accepted him quite quickly it has taken leveret a lot longer, but she is slowly getting there and i hope she will have settled down well enough over the next six weeks to enable me to go to busfest with swampy. in 15 years i have only missed it once and this year i want to go mainly  to have 8 whole days camped up in 'lilith'!

swampy has had some small minor repairs to make to her over the last few days and he has overhauled the breaking system with all new parts so it is nice and safe when on the road. we have been able to source a garage in the next village to store her and all our assorted camping equipment. 

luckily we are camping for two nights at the fairy festival so at least i will get in 'two sleeps' for now and keep my fingers crossed for cat-harmony in september!

***

~catching up~

 

things have been a bit slow since my last post, my lingering cold has hit my fibro quite badly and i have had a lot of pain in my arms and hands which means typing is painful.

today it is a smidge better and i just had to get here and pour out more words for those of you who read this blog regularly...i wish i know who you all were!

 

 

the weather has been quite rainy and again the forest is water logged, although yesterday we saw the first foal on the forest...the first foal we have seen. it must have only been a day or two old and was a dark one. every year in april we say to each other 'i wonder when we will see the first foal?'.

seeing the foals is a real indication that the great wheel has indeed turned and spring is here.

yesterday i also saw a few black lambs in a small field we pass when going shopping which resulted in much squealing!


***

next day

my hands and mind gave out at that point so here i am again to try and finish this post.


there was much excitement yesterday as my copy of pagan dawn was delivered...with my artists profile in!

 

i am so honoured to have two pages of my work for all to see.

 

***

 

our garden is slowly coming to life and is just bursting with green and early flowers which is attracting so many bee's~i have even had one angrily buzzing as it became caught in my hair as i passed under our clematis covered archway!

 

 

i met this little person sitting in my nook and it looks live he loves the garden enough to stay...

 

 

 

 i even sat out there one sunny morning to blend my Ritual incense (now for sale...sorry advertising!)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 and i even had a 'green boot day'

 

 

last week we stopped on our way home from my appointment at the pain clinic to look at the utter devastation one area of the forest suffered from the valentine storm

 

 

 

everywhere we looked here there were huge trees down, we tried to count and worked out there must have been way more than 60~just total devastation.

 

well, i have finally finished this post~i am still debating my move over to solsticedreamer.com and figure out how to have my own blog roll there.

 

anyway i hear coffee and toast calling me...have a good day!

 

 

 

 

 

 

*squeeee*

 

a little...but very exciting...announcement about

 

the wylde apothecary over at

 

the

 

blog

 

 

*squeeee*

~bread & cards~

 

the rain has stopped
 

all day there has been no rain
 

we had lots of sunshine and so our forest walk was wonderful but cold

 

even better i found a store of wood...even, even better it is oak

an oak had been blown down or undermined by water and come down and the forestry people had, for some reason, moved it from where it had fallen to the base of a large gorse bush.

 

it seemed right to find it because yesterday, while cleaning my work room, that there was room at the wylde apothecary for talking sticks, wands and ogham and runes sets.

so now a corner of my room holds rowan, oak and beech~drying out until they are birthed as something new.

 

***

 

i was catching up with folk on my blog roll earlier and was very excited when i found a post for no-knead, artisan bread at attic 24.

so excited in fact i am going to start a loaf tonight.

although we have a lovely bakery here in the village-a proper bakery where everything is made in site and they use all sourdough which i love.

but i also love the smell of bread baking...and i want to make the bread we eat, make it by hand, not in a machine. i want to cut into a loaf and think 'i made this'

so i am...so watch this space!!!

 

***

i have had my earth pathways diary delivered and instead of getting to work in my work room i made a mug of ginger tea and sat down reading through it~not reading every word, i like to slowly read through each written piece and savour the pictures and photos.

 

 yesterday i also did my first reading with my shamans oracle, i wont going into the detail of what i was seeking but, as with all readings from my various cards over the years, i was very surprised with the cards i drew and their 'answers'

 

 

 

 



yule is knocking on the door

 

its been a cold week here in this ancient forest and due to get colder although we are lucky not to have the rain and gales rushing through Scotland and northern England at the moment.

 

yule is upon us once again and as is now our own personal tradition we are going to stonehenge for a sunset ritual with the gorsedd cor gawr.

 

i am feeling quite festive early  this year, which is unusual for me~our tree went up last week, firmly anchored to the cabinet it sits next to it to protect it from climbing kittens...i got up in the night one night as flynt was crying and anxious to find a small bell and a little felted tree in the hallway. so for the time the tree is up the kittens are banned from the living room while we sleep to ensure the safety of the tree and to allow flynt a peaceful nights sleep!

 

***

i have been busy with my crafting for the wylde apothecary

i have ventured into the realms of creative copper and been busy making copper amulets and yule incense.

today i am venturing into something quite new...wet felting.

i have been needle felting for sometime now and in the past have felted small crochet items but i have had had new ideas spinning in my mind. i recently needle felted a small elemental 'mat' to be used as a small 'travelling altar' but then talking with a friend the idea of a felted pouch came into being, followed soon after with ideas for runes and ogham...so i really need to start making these items in order to get them out of my mind and into reality!

 

***

 

i now need to show you how beautiful the forest is right now...

the pigs out for pannage on the edge of the village...

heading out of the village...

heading into lymington by buckland rings...

back into the village and heading home...

 

 

 



~time needed~

 

these days i do not seem to have enough time in the day for all those projects i am doing/want to do

 

over at the wylde apothecary i have a couple of new things nearly ready for listing as well as needing to package up more of my hand blended incense. plus i have moved into the realms of working with creative copper and today will be firing my first experimental piece. all being well this means my first copper ogham pendants will be up for sale next week.

 

*

 

i have finally bought myself some rowan felted tweed and working up a storm with my crochet hook with 'avocado' (i have run out of bilberry already!)

 

*

 

i have a pile of books on the go~the one i cannot put down is joanne harris

 

Peaches for Monsieur le Curé

 

i am trying to pace myself, this being the final of the chocolat trilogy but become so absorbed in the story i find the pages rushing by. so this morning i vowed not to sit with my morning mug of tea and read more but wait for my bedtime mug of clipper 'snore and peace' tea and enjoy an uninterrupted hour read tucked under my blankets...maybe with a kitten or two at my feet.

 

*

 

mostly my mind is full of my soul journey~my spiritual path

this year, more than any other year after samhain as we fall deeper into the darkness, i find myself pulling back somewhat.

finding myself content to remain in my little home here in this ancient forest with all my tasks around me.

but whatever my task i find my mind constantly on my path and how it relates to my everyday life, how i can bring ideas of a soul journey to others by way of the wylde apothecary.

 

i am finding it easy to block out the things of 'modern life', to focus more on my ancestors and how they may have lived their lives.

 

 

 

 



~its here, i can smell it...~

 

its here

 

its really at my doorstep

 

i can smell it, sense it, feel it as a buzzing going through me

 

those of you here in the northern hemisphere will know what i am talking about if you are tuned into our land and its cycles

 

 

stepping out into the garden in the early morning or evening you can feel the turn of the great wheel taking us into the darker days.

 

there is a slight chill in the air and a feeling of everything slowly giving up the best of itself and drawing back into darkness to regenerate its powers ready for spring.

 

i find myself having to rush into the garden to make the most of these feelings~i love the chill air and the smell. it is a very particular smell and the energy in the land is buzzing and i feel it reverberating within me.

 

it makes me feel supremely happy.

 

its the darker days that i enjoy having a fire in my garden, wrapped up against the chill and burning incense, staring up at the darkening sky...so perfect.

 

 

 

my rowan tree is full of fruit that i had thought of making jelly with but i thought it better to leave them for the birds~maybe if i plant another one we can share them?

 

 

 

 

i have not been here with my thoughts for weeks now and i have been constantly fretting over this~wondering what you have all been up to.

i have been so busy in my incarnation as the wylde apothecary getting ready for the new forest fairy festival i had little or no time for much else.

 it is now over (a post here on the festival to come!)

and so things are going back to pre-festival 'normality' here in this ancient forest i call home.

 

i am finding myself wondering what to do with myself over the coming months

of course the wylde apothecary will be gently rolling on

i recently started to learn the ukulele which s proving to be great fun-it is an eddy finn concert uke (a smidge larger than the teeny soprano ones) and i bought a hard case so i can safely take it away with us camping and not worry about damage.

i have a huge pile of books that need reading-although i am reading about 4 books at the moment i can never resist buying more to add to my pile

i need to spend time coming up with some new incense blends~'sister moon' proved to be very popular at the fairy festival and at one point i had to sit in pretty pagan to make up some new packets.

i have a hankering to learn clog dancing but have found no teachers down this end of the country.

i find my mind returning to the idea of delving deeper into druidry via the obod or bdo online courses~but i am torn, part of me wants to delve deeper while another part of me thinks i do not need it...i think its just that i miss my ou work i am looking to replace it.

i am still considering birthing my own shamanic drum

 

...so many things i want to do!

 

but or now i need to tidy my work room!

 

 

 

 

 

 



~spoons & swimming~

 

well another long hiatus from yours truly!

 

i have no excuse other than that i become easily distracted and that recently i have only been able to do one 'big thing' daily before becoming so tired and sore.

 

let me explain...you all know by now the spoon theory, well i can only do one big thing or a couple of smaller things daily and some very minor 'pottering' before my spoons are seriously depleted and i need to re-charge and gain those lost spoons back.

 

we do our shopping once a week, although it wears me out i go and enjoy it because its one of the very few times i get out on a regular week. on shopping days i do shopping and that's it~i even plan a very simple dinner that day because i know that  wont be able to manage anything more than soup or a sandwich.

 

the thing is that as well as physically exhausted i become mentally exhausted as well which means that even coming onto my laptop, browsing the web and blogging is too much.

 

all of the aural and visual stimulation to me is totally overwhelming and exhausting.

 

it has taken me a long time to get over the moongazy gathering, then i had the excitement of seeing the moulettes and seth...

 

 

 

then last week we went to stonehenge with cor gawr for the midsummer sunrise which meant i was eating breakfast at 1am, after staying up to watch the full 'super' moon rise from my garden, and we were waiting to be let into the car park at stonehenge at 3am.

 

 

 

we met our friends taz, kit and mrb there and after, although sadly taz had to leave earlier, we sat in pretty pagan and warmed up with mugs of good hot tea and kits date and ginger cake.

 

so although it was amazing it was something else that used all of my spoons.

 

so i have been trying to re-stock those spoons...however my mind is in total overdrive right now with lots of craft ideas constantly spinning around, waking me in the night, plus i have to get enough wylde apothecary stock ready for the fairy festival next month.

 

so much to do and so many ideas with so little time!!!

 

*****

 

swampy and i have finally started swimming (which of course uses spoons!)

i am a real water baby and love being in water, be it indoor pool, sea, rivers and so even the aches and pains can be pushed aside for a little while. luckily there is little mental stimulation being in a pool, i just love swimming up and down at my own sweet pace.

although swampy is finding it somewhat of a struggle and he is not a good a swimmer as i am i get that 'competition' vibe emanating from him. he is convinced that for my 28 lengths he did 14 i know that at one point i was doing more than two lengths to his one, although of course  wont tell him that!

 

****

 

well now i shall make a start in popping by you all to see what you have been up to...it could take me a few days!



~sun & inspiration~

 

 

i think the sunshine has put my creative spirit into overdrive right now

 

i am brimming with new ideas for the wylde apothecary and have a busy couple of month ahead because in august i will be selling my wares at the

new forest fairy festival

 

i am very excited about this and swampy will of course be joining me as chief money-taker while i chat, create on the spot and generally enjoy myself. we are getting into the spirit of the festival by decorating our gazebo with ivy and willow fronds, fairy lights etc and of course we will be dressed for the event (i cannot wait to post the pictures!)

i know swampy is worried about how i will be over the two days but i intend to rest up the few days leading up to it.

i am sure it will be fine.

so if any of you out there happen to be in the new forest in august please come and see me!

 

***

 

thank you all for your comments regarding my last post.

our garden is quite small, although not as small as some (i have in mind the tiny garden i had in one of my old homes...weeny)

its 31ft/9m+ by 18ft/5m+...the plus allows for the extra inches.

as our house is L shaped the nook end is 4ft narrower.

 

we are lucky that these little houses were built in the early 70's when gardens were still a decent size...my mums house was built in the 20's and her garden is huge...a good few meters wider and about four-five times longer...and keeps me supplied with wood for my cauldron.

 

but we consider ourselves very lucky to live here with a lovely little house and garden and lovely neighbours.

 

***

 

i have yet to make any journeys to find out more about what i feel is the guardian spirit of our home.

i have found on my long spiritual journey if i try to force anything it just will not 'happen'.

i generally find myself experiencing a 'pull' to do a reading, travel on a spiritual journey...so i am waiting for that pull...

 

~post camp blues~

 

it always happens after a Stonewylde camp

the tears when we have to leave each other and the feeling of unreality that comes from suddenly being in a house again and regaining some semblance of 'normality'

 

i always then fight against the normality and try to keep the special feelings that camping with such special people brings.

 

luckily i will see them, not all of them, but some of them over the year and i am trying to find a good place for those of us living here in the south to meet up every couple of months.

 

the next big thing will be our equinox camp where we will be holding a small ceremony at the rollright stones and at samhain will be the samhain fairy fayre and ball in Glastonbury.

 

i am not sure i will be able to go to the ball but i love spending two days in Glastonbury spending my pennies!

 

***

 

this week we have been able to get out in the garden and we have finally bought the turf we need to lay the rest of our lawn.

we did have bark chips down but soon realised that it made the garden look too gloomy. we were lucky enough to get some turf from my mums garden which we have laid up the top around the pond, opposite my sky gazing deck and on Friday picked up the 6 turves to finish the top end and do the bottom area in front of my nook.

we prepared the ground yesterday~swampy did the digging and i broke up the big lumps with a hoe then raked it. we also did a bit of garden 'pottering', a little trimming, weeding between chats over the fence with calv.

 

on Thursday we finally bought a water but for the garden (calv was with us and he bought one too!) we had been looking for a slimline one but at the garden centre they had wooden ones with a brass tap and they were too nice to pass by.

it is quite big but we have figured that it will slot nicely next to the ferret-kids cage and the banksia rose will grow nicely around it and swampy will fit a down pipe from the gutter on calvs roof . so today the first job will be to move the water butt and i will rearrange the plants on the sky viewing deck while swampy lays the turves.

 

come have a look...

 

 this is the view up to my deck. you can see the water butt. some of the wood has weathered and a beautiful silver grey so i hope the rest weathers quickly. the trellis above it is to shield the garden somewhat from the shed the concretes next door put up on a high cement stand (no idea why they did this) the bush with the blossom is a Mexican orange blossom the growing wildly next to it is sweet woodruff which i will be drying to use in the wylde apothecary. 

 yours truly with the hoe!

 

 in this bed i have all kinds~salad burnet, valerian, holly, heathers, birdsfoot trefoil, geranium, wild violets, pansies, sage, from which i make my tea, assorted aquilegia...black barlow and nora barlow are my favorites and lots of snake's head fritillaries. we also have an old stone bird bath and a few standing stones. the ground around it is now ready for the turves.

 

our little pond and waterfall with the rowan standing guard. 

 

 

 this is the view sitting on my deck

 

 

 this is the first year the rowan has flowered and i am so pleased

 

 

 the little oak we found sprouting from its acorn in our old dorset garden is flourishing so well.

the wooden structure on the left is a rustic bin cupboard swampy built to hide the dustbin and recycling. later today he will be putting roofing felt ont he top so the horrid blue tarp can be taken off.

 

 

 the pants are growing up nicely in front of the deck...the green plant behind the gargoyle is lovage which is growing like crazy.

now we have the water butt sorted the next job is making a small compost bin. i had a chat with calv and he is happy to share one that i am going to put just outside our back gate as there is no room in the garden for one...the set out is a little odd here in that calvs house is at the end of our garden and his front door is round where our back gate is and accessed by a narrow pathway.

 

 

this little fairy came home with me from the moongazy camp...as yet we have not decided on a name, but i am sure she will choose one soon. i just love her green bloomers and boots!

 

well its time to stop here and go visit my blog family and then into the garden as we have clear blue sky and its too good to waste!