~moongazy gathering~drumming west kennet~

on the wednesday a group of us ended up a few moments down the road at avebury itself

my friend martin and holly-dog

after martin and i spent some time dowsing we all stopped for tea and food at the national trust cafe before heading a few minutes down the road to the west kennet long barrow, passing silbury hill on the way

i had my shamanic drum with me and so martin, kay and i spent some time in the barrow while i drummed. 

it was the most amazing experience. as we went in martin asked the spirits of the place if they would allow drumming and he had a positive response. we slowly walked down to the far end of the barrow and i slowly started a drumming pattern, one that slowly speeded up. after different periods of time i was drawn to stop~not a conscious decision to stop but almost as if a guiding hand was telling to stop for a short time. 

each time i was allowed to drum for longer periods and finally for the last few it felt as if i were being swept up into something more than just drumming, unconsciously my body would start to sway to the beat and it felt as if i were being drawn up into some ancient rhythm.

we also did a little experimenting, sending kay out to see where the drumming could be heard from~from either side of the entrance she could hear nothing and those sitting in the grass atop the barrow could hear it faintly, as if from a long distance.

finally, thanking the spirits of the place, who i hoped remembered me from last year, we left.

walking back down, we met tilli and chappie heading up, so we joined them and then diverted to the swollowhead spring on the way back down

then it was back to our vehicles and back to 'our' field, driving once again by silbury

next time...open mic acoustic night in calne!

~up, up and away~

things are getting busy here as we are less than a week away from the annual moongazy gathering.

Lilith has been moved from her garage over in burley~which i think is an appropriate place for her to live~she now sits five minutes away in my mums front garden.

we wanted to check for any damp or mould and give her an airing, plus swampy has constructed a new back box for her and a secure place for the leisure battery that is ferret proof.

as usual there s a lot to do, sort out clothes, slowly pack up the camper plus as my sister is cat-sitting i will be making her a cheesecake on tuesday.
 right now the house in in chaos with packing and given the slightly unstable weather here in england right now its a dilemma what to pack!

i have finished writing up the ritual and now need to find a few natural items to take to include in the sacred space.

of course swampy and i will be visiting Glastonbury and Avebury again~we always meet up with our friend the welsh wizard on market day in Glastonbury and as so many of our friends from the gathering will be there we usually end up in the blue note cafe or rainbows end for hot chocolate and cake.

*****

its going to be good to be away from the bricks and mortar, although i will miss my cat-kids so much but my sister is cat-sitting so will be in good hands.
i like nothing better than to sleep in my little crazy french caravan and drink my morning coffee sitting out in the grass with a view of friends bell tents and campers and the distant hill with its ancient barrows and knowing i am greeting the day in such a sacred area for it is easy distance from stonehenge, avebury, silbury hill, west kennet long barrow and glastonbury...plus more sacred sights.

so you can imagine what the energy is like. 

~more~

after my blog post of yesterday i felt really positive, as if i had really had climbed a big hill and achieved something. 

this sounds half-way daft but i think anyone out there with chronic health problems-whatever they may be- will understand that at times just small, everyday things can seem like a struggle.

over the last weeks i have sat and thought to myself how daft it is that i can't even open my laptop, just didn't even have the energy to open it and tap keys.

but i am going to try my hardest to keep coming back with posts.

*****

i am presently working on a ritual for our annual Moongazy Gathering. we performed a ritual last year with a few of us, which i blogged about here and this year, given the opportunity, i said that i would write the ritual as we had an idea to create a sacred space for the field we will all be living in for a week.

i was emailing my gorgeous friend and witch Sujee about it and it made me realise how much my path has changed since the experiences i blogged about last year.

for a long time my spiritual path was a winding one of discovery, i didn't label myself as anything more than a pagan. then i found druidry and it felt so comfortable...but not quite *right*

then i had my experience at the white spring in glastonbury and west kennet long barrow and it all changed.

this change is being reflected in the ritual i am now writing and my chats with Sujee~ i am again thinking of how my path changed and how i see myself as a pagan these days.

my spiritual path is much wilder now, a lot more unstructured, i tend not to be overly concerned with perceived rights and wrongs.
there is no single right way,
go with what your heart and soul sings out!

~drumming up the moon*earth mother & her green lord~

 

it seems right that this extended post should be in three parts


***

i have spent three days (thee again) on this post, getting no-where and becoming distracted until i finally ran out of possible words and thoughts and so gave up.

this morning i was up at that liminal time when the veil between worlds is thin and i stood in my garden surrounded by the scent of valerian and bird song, i heard the last conversation of an owl and when i heard the first morning calls of the crows i knew it was time to come in and write.

i admit this has been a very a difficult post to write, i think because it was part of something...
part of something larger over several days, weeks even, that caused a slight shift in my spiritual path and i keep having to stop and ponder, journal, ask my cards for more clarity.

i think at the end of the day it is all starts with labels
the labels we assign to ourselves, ones that are assigned to us by others

early on in our spiritual paths we label ourselves to fit into a specific category~a category that we actually wish for ourselves, that we think we should be, that maybe popular culture tells us we should be no matter what our heart tells us. we may fall into a path through our heart or through our reading. maybe we go through this process of labelling as a natural process that finally leads us to something that we find fits us and our spiritual practice perfectly

our spiritual path could take us through several 'incarnations' as we seek that perfect fit~that perfect place where we can stand alone or among a group of other pagans and know that we are on our 'right' path~the path that the universe intended us to be on. we no longer have the need, the urge, to seek any further.
more importantly we no longer feel we are wrong if we follow our own path because we realise that no matter how many books are written, no matter how many online articles and blogs are written instructing us in a particular path, no matter how many groups or orders are out there...at the end of the day we just do not know, there is no complete, written, ancient text that gives the whole, complete information for any particular path.
so any guilt/confusion we feel from not fitting any proscribed criteria, at being on a truly independent path, sloughs away like winters dead leaves and we feel all shiny and new. brimming with a new confidence that nothing can take away because we have travelled, maybe for many years, and we have undertaken our own form of initiation and come out the other side knowing that it is
right, that we have stood in the dark and been spoken to and told that 'yes this is right for you...'

 i sit here realising that i have gone through this process and found myself at this place, this time...this place that fits so well and feels comfortable, feels
right
and the final part of my 'initiation' took place over several days and  places...


air

 

i understand that the final part of my initiation started at the camp with a small private ritual during which the moon rose to the south while we were in our candle lit circle. it had not been planned that way, my beautiful friends who had written out the ritual had not consulted any almanac to find the exact time of moonrise and the place they chose came from the positive energy given out by a tree.
but as we stood in our sacred circle i noticed a small hint of light on the horizon and gently nudged my friend, nodding towards the light, one by one we all came to notice the rising of the moon and the ritual stopped while we all stood watching for a while, laughing and hugging and the rest of the ritual ended under the light of the full moon.
 the feelings that grew in me during this ceremony for friends were feelings of a circle slowly closing, that the ends were nearly meeting, that my unconscious searching was nearly at an end.


fire

the following evening as we sat around a large camp fire with music and laughter filling the air we again sat and watched the moon rise~this time was the drumming up of the moon, where those with shaman drums ran towards the moon, drumming and ululating wildly and it was a feral sound that made me feel almost complete...another part of that circle was closed


water

while in Glastonbury we went to the

 white spring

 

where i filled a bottle full of the water from the spring from which i take a little sip first thing in the morning and last thing at night and when i am close to running out its the perfect time to return.

 

once my bottle was full swampy and i went into the dark, chilly temple

 

 

 

 

as no technology is allowed these photos from the white spring website

within the temple lies three shrines~to Brigid, the guardian of the sacred springs where a  flame is always burning~to Our Lady of Avalon beside the healing pool and at the portal to the Otherworld lies the shrine of the King of the World of Faries.

if you haven't been to the White Spring it is so very difficult to describe~the spring gushing out from the rocks and filling the pools, the sacred water flowing over the top of the pools and flowing in rivulets along the floor.

the temple is lit only by candles and the sound of flowing water fills your ears but still there is a silence that fills you, a sacred silence that first fills your mind and then fills your body.
but it is not an empty silence, it is a silence filled with joy, with voices calling to you in welcome.
but these are ancient voices, new voices to me.
Brigid/Brighidh has been with me for a while now, slowly introducing herself with signs until i could no longer ignore them and she was here but there was another.
this other was older, far older~i am talking mother goddess, earth mother, Danu and Dôn.
and of course the essence of the lord of the wildwood, the green man, was there too, laughing among the flowing waters, making sure he was not forgotten.
i walked slowly around the temple, watching the spring flow into the pools from deep under the Tor, standing before each shrine, bathing my face in the ice cold water, my body was almost vibrating, humming from the feelings i was having, feelings that i was being given as a gift from a deity so much older than i imagined i would ever find.

i finally, and very reluctantly stepped out of this comforting, dark, watery temple~i wanted to stay there much, much longer and immerse myself in the pools, i stepped out into sunshine feeling transformed and that the circle more complete.


earth

the following day i stood at Avebury and felt a huge sense of peace fall over me and i lay for a while in the long meadow grass beside the great stones of the outer circle trying to absorb all the energy i could.

a little later found me walking the hill up to the West Kennet Long Barrow with that great symbol of the goddess, Silbury Hill to my back. this burial chamber is truly ancient...think back around 5000 years and then add a smidge of maybe another half a millennia...
ancient

i took a few other photos from this point but it doesn't feel right in posting them

within the burial chamber, as i walked though past the north and south chambers and into the rounded west chamber at the very end  i was getting the same feeling i had at the White Spring~there were no  threat in the darkness, if anything i  again felt comfort that the great earth mother had welcomed me into this ancient chamber and acknowledged me, allowing my time there to be uninterrupted. i held my hands out to the stones feeling an ancient vibration and greeted the ancestors.

this time, as i stepped out of this ancient and sacred place, the ends of the circle that had started to close days before finally joined together and the circle of my initiation was complete.


of course it doesn't end there, it never does.

i came home and still vibrating, humming from my experiences, looked though my journal.
i went back over weeks, to entries where i written down my card readings, the notes and musings i had made.
there was so much, so many words set into sentences and in the end i had to try to collate it into one easy to read page made up of single, repeated words
 the same things that kept coming up reading after reading and although i was aware of this as the days went by it wasn't until i returned home and looked again with new eyes that it all made sense...

interaction with spirit, ancestors, Brighid, Earth Goddess, Brighidh, Arianhrod, gifts of the Spirits
earth serpent, serpents, primal wisdom, deep soul knowledge
inner journey of spirit
rebirth, transformation, new paths,
springs, wells, river flow,
 weaving a web of life, synchronicity,
elements
otherworld
the embrace of spirits and their blessings

looking at it in this way i let out a huge sigh~i was not going crazy and reading my cards wrong, i wasn't 'inventing' something out of nothing. everything over the preceding weeks, months had cumulated into these events, at these sacred sites, some places i had not intended to visit on this journey, but timing and luck had me going to all of them.


reading back on this i feel nothing but joy that i have been taken by the hand and guided on this journey and although the circle has been completed i am still on a great journey.
i am looking at things from a new perspective, its almost as if the decades have rolled back and i am starting anew. which, of course, in a way i am, but with considerably more wisdom than i had before and with a maturity that makes me feel i can walk the path that the great earth mother and her wild green consort has laid before me and be open to anything that crosses my path.
i am looking at my sacred garden with new eyes, at my altar inside with new eyes and feeling grateful that i can turn a little aside from the norm that is given us on our pagan paths and forge a new path, with new ways of doing things, knowing that the simple rituals of my life are guided by the great earth mother.










i have seen people moaning that the taking of photos and film should be allowed in the White Spring Temple and why is there no proper lighting to see properly? well if they feel this then they do not get it and should maybe stay away from what is a highly sacred place to many, who do not want the flash and whir of cameras and mobile phones to disturb their mediations...or even better why do they they not discard this technology, kick of their shoes and wait and see what may happen to them in the darkness.

~drumming up the moon*part two~

 

day two of the gathering dawned bright and warm and the temperature rose with the sun.

 

more and more people arrived, tents, caravans and campers sprouted over the field like great toadstools and the laughter and calls of happy folk spread on the breeze.

 

that night we built a large fire and sat around it chatting, laughing, listening to those with the instruments play and sing.

 

T and L had their shaman drums and as the lady moon started to rise they drummed her up to cries and ululations.

 

solstice cafe

new stonewylde bags~we bought two!

beautiful celebration cakes

solstice café and stonewylde stall

our house band

tarot readings



chyna's beautiful works of art

***

 

finally the camp was over and from sunday afternoon we had to start saying goodbye to all our friends~always such a difficult thing to do.

the field slowly emptied until there were only a small group remaining

 

of course we could not go to Glastonbury...

 

 

 

we got there nice and early to get a parking space down the bottom of town by the Abbey and market and met our friends carp and crystal at the blue note café~sitting in the courtyard by star child enjoying a latte to wake me up!

 

 

of course i had to spend some pennies...

 

to add to my glennie kindred library

although i blend my own incense its tradition i buy at least one from starchild~this is Gaia and smells glorious

a beautiful ceramic bowl (dried leaf from Avebury!) and...

a beautiful Tor pendant.

we all left on Wednesday and we made the very small mile or two detour to avebury

then down the road to the west kennet long barrow

 

its hard to describe the feelings i had when i walked into the chamber, making sure there were no other people who were going to follow me in

 

even now thinking back the feelings are strong

 

ancient was one feeling, when you remember that it is a Neolithic barrow, older than the oldest phase of stonehenge, you cannot escape the feeling of age.

 

thoughts of the ancestors also came to me, the people who built this structure, the people living in small communities nearby and why this whole area~silbury, avebury, the sanctuary, windmill hill~was so sacred to them.

it made me think of my ancient ancestors~a part of my family down my maternal line all come from Wiltshire, mostly clustered around amesbury, old sarum and stonehenge~so far i have only gone back 500 years but i secretly wonder if my older ancestors lived in the area thousands of years ago and lived to see these sacred sites.

i really would love to find out...maybe a pathworking would help?

 

i felt a strong energy there

some people maybe don't because it is a chamber of the dead, but as i went further into the chamber i could feel it buzzing around me~it  had a smell of rain and damp earth and old, old stones

 

i strongly felt the goddess there but maybe she was following me...